People are complicated. And often disappointing. I think that’s why I prefer dogs in many cases; they’re pretty straight forward more often than not. Don’t get me wrong. I have plenty of people that I do like just fine and consider myself lucky in that regard. I have friends, family and coworkers that I have good to great relationships with, people to listen to me vent when I just need to get a rough day off my chest, people that will help me problem-solve when I can’t see the whole picture clearly or just support me, saying I’m thinking about something the right way, people to walk my dogs when I need to be gone for an entire day or feed my reptiles while I’m out of town for a week that are happy to do it just because I’ve helped them out with something before, people who will take trips into the mountains with me, make me laugh, share a tasty meal or just sit (or walk) in comfortable silence with me. Those every day people mean the world, especially in times like now where so many tangential interactions seem so frustrating.
Some days recently, I wish I didn’t have to leave my house (unless I’m escaping to the woods or mountains or anywhere that other people won’t be). I wonder: are there any rules to driving anymore? Every day, I see rudeness, impatience, downright dangerous maneuvers playing out on my drive to and from work or the grocery store or the local park. It’s a little terrifying. I get packages delivered that are barely sealed from rough handling during transit. (What if there was something fragile in there?) Thankfully, my clients are usually pretty sane and tame, but even if they behave normally with me, the doctor, that doesn’t guarantee that they treat the rest of the staff the same way.
Last week, a client was fired after throwing a fit in the lobby and making one of our receptionists (who is very good at her job and usually one of the most composed people I know) cry. The reason for the outburst? Her preferred doctor doesn’t do one of the procedures she wants to schedule for her dog. Also- only that one doctor and a different receptionist are the only “legitimate people” that work at our hospital. I don’t know what that means, exactly, but no one needs that kind of off-the-handle behavior in their life.
This morning, I was talking to another of my colleagues (a wonderful doctor/surgeon/dentist/human/friend/you name it, she’s wonderful) who did a dental procedure a dog a few months back that our records indicate was having trouble chewing for a couple of months prior to the procedure. The owner has been in multiple times for post-op rechecks and now got another opinion from her vet in another state (where she lives half of the year) that recommended she see a specialist (already recommended for this client by yours truly) for the dog’s ongoing trouble chewing. This client, however, has it in her head that her dog was fine before the procedure and suffered brain damage as a result of anesthesia, and that is why she can’t chew normally. She informed my colleague that she doesn’t intend to sue her because she realizes that my colleague isn’t a boarded dentist, and she did sign all of the paperwork approving the procedure, but she just wanted her to know that the dog “isn’t right” because of a procedure she did.
And that is why I sometimes wish I was just independently wealthy, didn’t have to leave my house ever if I didn’t want to and didn’t have to feel so responsible for everyone else’s pets all of the time. I am not a miracle worker. I am a human and only have so much control over anything that happens in the world, in life, in the outcome a treatment plan. Fighting against all of the idiot drivers to get to a job where you may be told you aren’t real or that you caused harm to someone’s beloved family member (even when you know in your heart and mind and soul that you did everything in your power to help that pet) drains you mentally, emotionally and physically.
Not everyone is like that. I saw a woman in the grocery store last week move into a line for a register that was about to open turn around and tell the old woman in line behind her to go ahead, that she stood there for her. I have some clients (and neighbors that know what I do) that regularly thank me for being a veterinarian and taking care of their animals. Some clients sing the praises of the entire staff. We have one pair of clients that have paid for lunches and “filled the fridge” at work with snacks for everyone multiple times in the past year and half because they appreciate us all so much. Sometimes, the negative interactions just have a bigger effect though. I know that I could and should try harder to acknowledge the positive moments and interactions and keep those with me. That’s probably true for most of us.
“Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.” ~ Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
